Day 9: Tsk Tsk

Oh, the Tsk Tsk Department of Lipstick is heating up! Just as I finished building my new Tsk Tsk box, we received our first formal Tsk Tsk from someone other than ourselves. We know Coral didn't fill out the form because the only time she picks up a pen is to take an order at the tavern, or to write a man's phone number in her black book.

If you didn't already know, my Tsk Tsk box is home to Cora's naughty Halloween costumes and the party dresses she buys from Slinky's Emporium. I offer to lend Coral my tracksuits to wear, but she says she is allergic to excess fabric.

Hank and I also placed a TSK TSK form box in the entryway of The Cotton Barn, and we encourage people who read our blog to report TSKs from around the world. The world must be in great shape because we have only received one response so far.

Pritty: Ta do!

Hank: What are we ta d-ing about?

Pritty: My new Tsk Tsk box!

Hank: It is a beacon of beauty.

Coral: Oh, that is so gaudy. Nothing screams nerd alert like a siren on a box.

Hank: And are those sirens on your shoes, Pritty?

Pritty: Yes! I am going to walk down Main Street on the weekends.

Coral: And do what?

Pritty: The usual, wag my finger at people.

Hank: Pritty, people don't like being scolded. Maybe leave the box at home, but please do show off your siren sneakers!

Pritty: Do you think the sneakers are enough to deter people from nefarious activity?

Hank: Certainly. They scream law enforcement chic. Now, what did you say about us receiving our first official tsk tsk?

Coral: You have a tsk-tsking club? Oh brother.

Pritty: Yes! I think our form looks menacing, yet professional. I believe people (and animals) will be happy to report tsk-tsk's they see in their community. Look at this letter from our true-blue friend Lisa.

Hank and Coral stood over my shoulder and read the letter.

Hank: It sounds like Lisa's town needs a better Mayor.

Coral: It sounds like Lisa has a lot of spare time on her hands.

Pritty: I would never litter!

Coral: Oh, I think otherwise, Pritty! I found one of your housewarming party invites blowing behind the tavern when I was taking out the trash one night.

Coral handed me one of my crumpled invitations.

Hank (to Coral): You have been waiting for this moment, haven't you.

Coral smiled!

Pritty: I let the wind help me hand out invitations when I placed them in the front basket of my scooter.

Coral: Well, if you were planning on inviting rats from the alley, it worked great!

Pritty: Well, no rats showed up at my party.

Hank: The point is, Pritty, that littering is not good for the environment.

I may have slumped down in my chair.

Pritty: Mother Nature wins again.

Hank: And having your contact information blowing around town isn't safe either. I have been lifting weights, but I'm not sure I can protect you from an intruder.

Pritty: Oh, I can handle intruders myself with a little High Notice Alert chants. I just can't believe that I unknowingly performed a Tsk Tsk. I need to go install a lid on the basket on my scooter.

Coral: I'll walk you out. We need to be sure the lid is high enough to fit a wine bottle in the basket.

Hank: Coral, can't you see she is crushed? She littered! That tsk tsk may as well have been directed at her!

Coral: Except it wasn't, it took place in a totally different town. She isn't the first litterbug, and she won't be the last.

Hank raised his hands in the air. I did ten touches to calm down and went to put on my construction gear, and Coral laughed.

Then she helped me purchase and install a mega basket on my scooter with a lid (high enough for even a wine bottle). Tsk Tsk.

If you can still love us,

Hugs and Kisses,

Litterbug Pritty and Hank

To report a tsk tsk, please email us at prittyandhank@gmail.com